Salt and Light of the world.

pur_pleprose.livejournal.com
:))

MOVED.

i think it's funny how people always want the things that they dont have, but they forget the things that they actually do have.
everyone's life seems to revolve around seeking.
today marks the start of extended studies, well, paying attention wasnt that hard.
except i screwed up bio mock spa.
and i was simply too lazy to do it again.
well, people learn from mistakes.
ahh. i was at bras basah too.
tell me why.
oh right, i still want my mambo jumbo shirt.
and my abrasion is emitting pus.
you gotta love it man.
faith muscles equals when you lift weights you dont feel a thing
its almost like you're carrying feathers.
gotta do the workout.
oh, i am dead sure my printer's screwed up for life.
the worst thing?
it's not even 2 years old.
oh yeah. i like funny people.
funny people ftw.
not funny as in funny in the head, but the kind that
makes you laugh.



oh yeah.
and you can think whatever you want.
and your thoughts shall fly high high up above into the sky.
does love and let go belong together?

cant hold me down, gotta reach for the skies
because there's a passion an inner strength that drives.

"you can't compare mariah carey and lady gaga can you?!"


haha i had fun today.:)
except my abrasion was hurting like alot, and some fluid was coming out. gross.
went with aqilah to get my math textbooks and leotards
but sadly the sonata shop was closed, so we ended up walking around the whole area for three hours i think.
but it was super duper fun, you gotta be there to feel it.
like really artsy fartsy and everything, cause we walked from bugis to wilkies edge to museum to raffles to esplanade to fullerton to victoria theater.
it felt like big walk or sth.
and we took super alot of pictures.
its been a long time since i've taken so many pictures
sota's actual school building is the coolest thing i've ever seen.
and i want my mambo jumbo shirt.:)
dance fest is so cool:D
yup. gonna go for the rock kids pdn thing tomorrow and maybe on thurs too, but there's ballet, and they're gonna work on the pointe item. o.0

and
"we should do this again!" for ten times straight.


i've got this funny feeling in my gut.
its strange to think that some new chapter of my life is gonna start.
and people say that moving on is always good
but everything's too fast paced,
and i dont want life to move so fast
changes are hard to adjust to
and this one's no different.
i dont want to be sec four.
i dont think im that scared of the work.
but it's just the new feeling that you get.
like how you're moving on,
moving higher up a ladder
it's just strange ok. im not ready for that.
i dont want time to move so fast
it's going to be christmas soon, then the new year
and then in a few months the big os
and then what? jc? poly?
i need time to breathe slowly and think about what i want to do
with my life.
it's strange to think that sixteen's not that far off.

i want to upload the pictures but my printer's refusing to.
weekend was fun,  pretty epic, esp since i flung myself into the air.
but it was funfunfun, and i cant wait for the next dg outing.:)
summer and her sharkie and beary and rabie and what not.:)
love them all. but now i've got a big bruise right on my knee and it hurts.
cant even dance properly.
i dont know why but  i think im getting tired of grade 8.
i've relearned the dances at least three times straight.:(
went to ruoxi's house today, watched ballet videos and talked alot:)
super duper envious of the paris le cole ballet students.
they dont look human.
haha, i dont wanna go for extended studies.
my brain is not ready yet.
ughughugh. tomorrow maybe gonna go get sonata leos and buy the friggin emath text.
dance fest is too cool:)
there's like some free style thing going on outside esplanade.





how will i ever stop believing?
you are like a giant net that catches everyone and never lets them go:)
with valleys come mountains and with mountains come valleys
but i'll be forever safe in the fisherman's net.
i know i'll see good. seeing good, and will still see good.

i wonder if it's possible to be vulnerable and strong all at the same time.

wow.
i just realise that there are people out there who are so real.
ah, im so overwhelmed now, but not in the bad way.
i read the psalms 23 that ruoxi sent me, and i felt so super touched by it.
cause its just about everything you will need in life, if you think abt it.
i dont know, guess it doesnt take the cheem cheem bible verses to make someone feel loved.
let hope arise.:)

here's a part of it:

The Lord is my Shepherd = That's Relationship!
I shall not want = That's Supply!
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures = That's Rest!
He leadeth me beside the still waters = That's Refreshment!
He restoreth my soul = That's Healing!
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness = That's Guidance!
For His name sake = That's Purpose!
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death = That's Testing!
I will fear no evil = That's Protection!
For Thou art with me = That's Faithfulness!
Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me = That's Discipline!
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies = That's Hope!
Thou annointest my head with oil = That's Consecration!
My cup runneth over = That's Abundance!
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life = That's Blessing !
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord = That's Security!
Forever = That's Eternity!

Face it, the Lord is crazy about you.
What is most valuable,
is not what we have in our lives, but
WHO we have in our lives!

Even though you can't see Him, GOD is there for you

When Jesus died on the cross, he was thinking of you!

:)
i may not know what my future holds,
but i know who holds my future.
He promises that its gonna be good:)


feeling overwhelmed now.
but its a good sort of overwhelmed.
thank you jesus for everything.
for your grace that always always sees me through.
for real friends.
for people who genuinely care.:)
for love.
for purposes.
for gifts.
:)



-you are not the bimbo i thought you were.
-i miss you.
-unstoppable drive.
-surrounds me like a shield.
-you're the honey to my star.
-you tell me you're proud of me.
-that made me smile.
-you take that first brave step i never thought you would.
-you're the drive that keeps me going.
-and i will make it, i know i will.
-i like how this is going.
-with mountains come valleys, and with valleys come mountains
-mustard seeds.
-rudolf nureyev ftw.
-we can do this.:D
-we will do this.
-why do i care anymore?:DD i. am. freed. :D


 

okay results have been pretty screwed up so far.
haha, even my el paper 1 also, apparently i wrote a very contradictory essay.
shall not dwell on it though.
although i am friggin scared for history paper tomorrow.
it's the first thing in the morning yknow.
today was pretty epic.
mosquitoes, white musk, noise pollution, weird people who randomly answer your rhetorical questions
and disturbing nonsensical lil kids.
haha omg so fun.
but i openly declare that i hate hate hate mosquitoes with every single fibrous.
and no im not looking forward to extended and mtp and revision,
which unfortunately will still happen no matter how much i resist.
i must learn to like it man.
ah, i've got the butterflies thinking about history.
gahhhhhhhh.
k thx bai. dg outing on sat! somewhere fun i hopeeeeee.
i think i forgot how to study.

weird.
my father just told me that he thinks im losing my focus.
i was like, what focus?
i think im pretty focused anyway.
except for the sleep part.
idk why i keep sleeping and sleeping.
omg, i want to stop sleeping.
like sleep normally and not have screwed up sleeping hours.
results back today.
and for the next three days.
i failed chem, but it's ok.
actually when they were going through, it didnt seem that hard.
haha but under exam conditions i think its very different.
anyway tried my best alr, so no regrets.
yeah i realise how unsciency i am.
haha but i think history's the scariest paper.
i roughly know how im gna do for everything,
but i have no idea about history cause many times when you think you're right, you're actually wrong.
eeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkk.
let us love life.
extended studies and science spa and cheena paper and whatever shitzxzxz FTW.



just for fun, camwhoring yesterday during cca.:)cca makes me a little pissy, but shall not dwell on it.





my leg looks friggin short.

my favourite dancers ever.:)
tofu dances and GORGUD.
haha, love them tons.




heard this song for the first time at viv's church and i fell in love with it!

"ballet is the most sophisticated because it is the least natural, but looks good only when it looks natural."




wow feels like a long time since i've blogged!
haha sheesh i was late for dance today.
i set two alarm clocks but i still pressed the snooze button.
hopefully this wont happen tomorrow or else i'll have to do detention already i think.
so weird, i was never late for so many times in sec one and two.
ah anyway, dance was ok.
oh i wanna watch 500 days of summer!
especially since everyone keeps raving about it.
getting back results tomorrow.
chem and ss. jesus help.:)
ballet tomorrow.:) and for the rest of the week as well.
haha love life mans!
today's a happy happy day:)
jesus you're so very very good to me:)
and i know this is so very very slow.
but i realise something!
to do all things for the glory of God!
meaning not to do things for your own glory, to gain attention
but all for Jesus!
and it's good in the sense that there's no longer a pressure on yourself
to be good
cause you're doing it all for Jesus so even if you don't do it well
there's no condemnation.
and if God wants the glory, then He has to do all the work.
He has to work through you for you to give the best results for His Glory.:)
awesome!
no longer i but christ in me.:DDDD
haha gosh i feel like im on cloud 9.
anyway i feel like not blogging anymore.
haha see first see first.










And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish send it to heaven then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy for all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of..
The highest powers.

hello.
it's been awhile since i've posted.
or should i say it feels like awhile.
i had a weird dream yesterday about bugs and cambodia and hot air balloons.
and i got so into the dream i woke up at twelve!
post exams werent so bad afterall.:)
had fun at marina barrage. saw malcolm there!
no dare today cause it's deepavali.
so i went to viv's church without viv! haha met jianmin and she brought me.
it's a good experience i guess, especially since it's been years since i've been to another church.
ah, the atmosphere's different but in a good way!:)
had a good service.
sat with a whole row of TK girls.:D
have to go back to school on tues for dance.
hmmmm. i just made something for the dancers! hope they'll like it.:)
i hope we can have dg outing on monday.
we need to go cycling together! havent done that for so long.


have been thinking pretty alot about stuff.
sometimes anger blinds you.
then you go do the stupidest things in the world.
it's so easy to allow yourself to be angry.
so many things you could be angry about.
sometimes i feel so betrayed when things dont go my way.
ugh, the way which i think is right.
and then i go and blame God.
that's why i think it's so impt to keep going to church and being in God's presence.
cause anger is blinding.
it veils God, and going to church unveils jesus and all of His loveliness and you stop being angry!
stop feeling like shit.
haha, it's so refreshing.
that is, if you go, and you just allow jesus to come in.
and not be cynical or whatever.
ah, im so glad.
jesus makes me glad.
jesus is hope that keeps you going.
sometimes i get tired of whats going on.
it's funny, the human mind.
when things are going stray, ppl are moaning and complaining.
that's what people do. and when things are fine, people start getting bored with their life.
i always forget.
it's too easy to forget about how good God is.
and too easy to be disillusioned.
cause we only see the small picture, worms eye view.
but God sees the big picture. birds eye view!
so God knows whats best for me.
there's nothing i can do also.
if God wants it that way, He's gonna have it His way.
so why bother trying anyway.
i want to drive the devil nuts.
so fun.
ok jesus pls remind me everyday about how good God is cause i know the devil
likes to make me forget.
so please give me a post it everyday to tell me how good God is.
love ya loads.
you are my BFF always.
we dont need to care about the world.:)






 

i was glad exams are over.:)
but then i realise that its NOT OVER.
chinese os in less than a month.:(
on to happier things, swensens was pretty fun.:)
MALT BALLS. very very funny issues.
i hope i can skip marina barrage tomorrow.
i would rather cca anyday, cause i dont wanna go marina barrage.
in fact i want to skip all the post exam activities.
and i wanna go for ballet:)
there's no dare this sat, no dare till november.
but there's a wedding!:) although i think i wont go cause it's too early in the morning.
im reading a book about really brilliant ballet teachers.
it's a great book, i think teachers can really make or break a student.
i mean in the end, you're the one that's gonna do it, but teachers are like the arrows on the road that help you to find your direction.
and i've finished chermaine's time traveller book:)
i like the movie better, the book's a little too draggy.




 

chem paper was so hard.
i spent way too much time on mcq, and some questions were just senseless.
it's a crazy crazy paper, incredibly taxing and mind boggling.
and then mr goh goes up to a girl and taps her on the shoulder while she ponders over the question and he mouths "so easy right"
ugh. ugh. amath was okay, except for trigo, which is funny cause i thought i'll do well for the trigo part.
anyway, it's over so nevermind.
geez i dont feel like studying.
emath paper tomorrow.
im so tired of math.
tomorrow will be better than today
cause the path of the righteous gets brighter and brighter.


MY BFF IS VERY VERY COOL CAUSE HE TIME TRAVELS.
FOR REAL.



i was reading your blog. your old blog encapsulating the old you, the past you and i realised how different you've become. it's sad how we've drifted away to idk how far apart until talking becomes so hard. words have to be choked up, the atomsphere is so tense, i feel like im treading on ice.
you should read your old lj.

Teo Hui Mimn if you're reading this
i wanna say you're one of the most awesomest friends i ever had
even though i havent talked to you in like, 3 years?
but you're super awesome.
thanks a million.:DDD



dg yesterday was good.
im so glad i went:)
cause i dont really like going for dg.
but yesterday's was good.
we did exam papers seh. haha not real exam papers, but it was fun.
wrote our cares on postits and pasted them onto balloons
then we let them go into the air:)
yoshika is super cute i think.
haha she makes me laugh.
tried studying chem and amath.
i hope what i study comes out:)
omg i was looking at my primary six profile book, and i tweet!
i dont remember tweeting, ugh.
so gross okay.
didnt go church today.
album launch:( and reverend col stringer cause ps prince is in hillsong!
why do all the songs in the album sound like only sg is singing?
ballet later. i miss miss wendy, omg.:(
jesus you're so good to me:)
jesus rocks.
jesus you're awesome.
jesus you are my best friend always and forever and im not gonna give you up for anything.
we are Best Friends Forever and ever and ever.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFe76TtELcA

hello people you gotta watch this, it's really cute i think. haha and really apt and funny now, cause it's exam period.:D
dunno if i should go dg tomorrow, still contemplating.
oh man, i can't wait for the new album launch The Perfect Offering on sunday at church! i think the album's gonna be good.:)
today's papers were alright, three more papers down and that's it.
surprisingly, its not as longlasting as i'd thought it would be.
bio and lit was alright, stupid mistakes in bio mcq plus liver functions and water functions didnt come out.-.-
now bio's stuck in my head, i keep relating the stuff i do to bio chapters.
lit was okay, except i kept writing wrong words and cancelling and recancelling. its annoying cause it only happens during exams.
i will try not to do the passage inclusive question anymore.
three questions instead of four give me better security.
i liked the poem, but i wasn't sure about the interpretation so nevermind. besides, i think prose was more relatable.
tried to study chem, but ended up sleeping and reading time traveller's wife.
and then it was ballet and now im home again, so basically i didnt study at all.
chem is scaring me. im terrified i think. mrs chan makes it sound like the paper's gonna be the end of the world.
maybe its cause i dont understand half the shit of what she says in class?
dont get me wrong, shes awfully nice, but i just have issues with chemistry (LOL) 
ballet was good, im pretty sure i'll do demi charactere, since its more manageable, valse needs a hell lot of stamina.
can't decide between poetique and dramatique though. dramatique is so... dramatic.
with the scarf and the acting like snow white in the woods.
ruoxi's gonna go for the master class at sdt this week:) haha so cool, but i bet the places all taken up.
it's like summer school i guess. and its the auditions for rbs too...
miss sham's chereographing for some kinderland perf in dec. we gonna be the so called interval item to let the kids change for their grad perf.
gonna hit the books nao. :D


"SAY SOMETHING NICE OR SAY NOTHING."
that's what i've been trying to do.
see, im actually not brainless.
friends are like books you see.
sometimes you can't stop reading cos its so interesting.
other times you open a book with a somewhat nice cover
only to realise the content isnt exactly what you like.
e.g a book on how math formulas are derived.
and you snap the book shut with no more than faint distaste.

 

whoops.
i just remembered yesterday while trying to doze off to sleep that i still owe the moon ten bucks!!!!!
howhowhow?

hello oh happy day!
i cant wait for EJ5! ^(*&(*)(_(_$^$ cause EJ4 was so awesome.
not awesome in the games are awesome sense if you know what im talking.:)
studied in the morn, then went for dare service, met zephen outside.
i hope they release the NCC album tmrw!!
service was great. i think i havent said it for a long time, but today's service was good.
about casting your cares unto the Lord because He cares for you more than you care for yourself.:)
im so glad i went.:) plus sg damn zai can.
ahhh i miss charissa!:) she was singing with the choir today.
and i kinda miss RS.
grass patch later on, sat with an emo kia.
talked for awhile, tried to study. no one knows how to do mr peh's 08 bio paper.
went esplanade library, saw all these cute old people carrying lanterns walking around.:) so sweet.
wanted to borrow mockingbird disk, but its on loan.
went to rooftop to talk for abit. its a nice place to talk to people. pretty scenery, good music and guitar playing, tonight got people carry lantern.
but im damn sad cause my doodle got washed away:(
so today is mid autumn, not really sure what its called, but i can't see the moon at all, even though its supposed to be roundest tonight.
used to carry lanterns around when i was small but not anymore.
oh man, jesus saved my life today. jesus rocks.
oh yeah just checked out this website on the Faces of Belmez its super duper eerie.
http://www.thecobrasnose.com/xxghost/belmez.html
like this woman found faces on the floor one day and she cemented it but the faces reappeared again.
damn scary, then they found out that there were bodies beneath the house.



Give thanks
With a grateful heart
Give thanks
To the Holy One
Give thanks
Because He's given
Jesus Christ His Son

Psalms 149:3 Let them praise his name in the dance: let them sing praises unto him with the timbrel and harp

im awful but there's always grace for the awful.:)
trying to climb around in everyone's skin and walk around in it.
maybe i'll understand people more.
sometimes, i just get so hotheaded and think about what im facing instead of what other people face.
i realise too, that things may not work out just cause you want them too.
there are factors involved, haha like in history, and yeah, its hard to have it "your way".
but it's alright.
hmm. mockingbird really teaches me alot. everytime i read it, i learn sth.
and it'll be one step at a time for now, and i will try to walk around in people's skin.
i hope they walk around in mine too:)
today's ss paper and chinese paper was tiring.
i guess it wasn't one of those killer papers, but fye papers are always not very easy. esp chinese.-.-
but for some reason i just felt very tired doing the chinese paper.
ss was a frantic rush, like always. for chinese i felt like i was writing forever, and when i was about to conclude my essay i realise that i only wrote one sheet of paper. haha it really felt like i wrote alot though, so i had to continue.
was so dead tired i went home and slept all the way through and woke up, didn't do anything, went for ballet.
miss shyamala gave us children's day presents!! she gives them every year, lol.
oh, i tried this yoghurt at white sands, it's like the best yoghurt ever.
its like a healthier version of ice cream chefs, you get to mix in stuff yourself!:) damn awesome.



you bring me to your throne
whisper love songs to me
you think of me you call me your own

because You are my very present help in times of need.
what have I to give you? nothing.
but you gave your life for me.
meditate on the good things.:D
 

tkgs is positively insane, im not kidding.
the papers are so hard its not like what we study might even come out.
esp chem and bio. they give crazy questions.
today was a crazy day.
im no exception.
i think i did the daftest thing ever.
thought i'd never do it, but yeah humans are so superduper unpredictable.
so. tomorrow's el paper. i think blogging helps right?
at least you won't blank out when you warm up to writing.
i think. for me it works.
the el teacher scares the shit out of me with all her korments on the el paper.
i will not blank out tomorrow yes?
i will write a decent, more than decent piece of writing.
starting to like lit lessons alot.
the teacher makes a big difference doesnt it.
at first i thought mockingbird was boring, what with all the slang and i nearly fell asleep reading the first few chapters.
but now i really like the book.
many many connections and themes that are subtly added into the plot.
the lit teacher makes the characters and plots and themes all so very interesting
i miss dancing, quite senseless i know, since you can dance anywhere and everywhere, so there's nothing to miss,
but nothing like going for classes.
dancing is therapeutic man.
reading acts now, its actually pretty cool i would say.
im scared it will never come.
scared no amount of practise will be enough.
ugh.



it's a sin to kill a mockingbird because they dont do one thing but sing their hearts out for us.
too many mockingbirds, too little courage.
we are all little maycombs inside out.

HAHA MY LIFE CANNOT GET MORE EPIC THAN THIS MAN.
OMG.
ITS SO FUNNY IN THE GOOD NOT SARCASTIC WAY I FEEL LIKE IM ON TOP OF THE WORLD.
GOT THE YOU CANNOT CATCH ME THAT KIND OF FEELING.
HAHA. SO FUNNY. I JUST FEEL LIKE TYPING IN BLOCK LETTERS.
YAY, TODAY'S SERVICE WAS GOOD.
YESTERDAY'S MID AUTUMN HEARD IT WAS NICE.
PS PRINCE PREACHED ABOUT RESTORATION THEN AFTER THAT I BECOME MORE HAPPY.
HAHA. I LIKE THE I SING PRAISES SONG!
INDOOR STADIUM TODAY QUITE COOL SIA. GOT GIGANTIC BALL BALL FLYING AROUND THE PLACE.
SO FUN. IF GOT PICTURE I WILL PUT HERE.
CAUSE PRE SERVICE CHJ AND PS GABRIEL MAKE US DO NCC WAVE, AND SOME SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA THING AND THEN AFTER THAT THEY THROW BIG BALL BALL AROUND THE PLACE, THEN EVERYONE PLAY UNTIL VEH HIGH, EVEN THE OLD OLD PPL ALSO.
PS PRINCE VEH HANDSOME. :) HE WEAR WHITE COLOUR LOOK LIKE PRINCE.
BALLET AFTER THAT. DONT LIKE DEMI CHARACTER. I STILL LIKE ETUDE LYRIQUE AND VALSE.:)
I NEED TO PRACTISE PRACTISE PRACTISE.
FOR SOME STRANGE REASON, I ACTUALLY PREFER DOING INTER WORK TO G8.
ANYWAY, I WAS VERY SLEEPY JUST NOW SO I SLEPT.
THEN I WOKE UP AND READ MY TIKAM. I LOVE TIKAM NOW.
SO EXCITING SEHHHH. GOT TOM ROBINSON CASE, THEY ARE IN THE COURT NOW FIGHTING.
I CANT WAIT TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS.
I ALWAYS SAY I DONT LIKE MY LIT BOOK, BUT BY THE END OF THE YEAR I ALWAYS LIKE IT.
EL EXAM ON THURS. EEEEK. THATS WHY IM READING TIKAM AND BLOGGING NOW.
HAHA. I THINK WILL HELP. I WANT SATURDAY TO COME SO I CAN GO WALK WITH SUMMER AND ZEPHAN LIKE THE OTHER TIME WHEN WE WALK FROM ESPLANADE TO CHINATOWN.
OMG.
I WANNA GO BERMUDA TRIANGLE. HAHA

I AM SO HOPELESSLY HOPELESS THAT I CANNOT DO ANYTHING BUT TO HOPE IN THE LORD.
BECAUSE THERE IS NOTHING ELSE FOR ME TO DO BUT TO TRUST. :) YAY.

sheesh, my elbow hurts like shit.
i don't really know why too.
oh yeah, i really think the joseph prince podcast is really cool!:)
there's the midautumn evangelistic thing today, haha i wonder how it went.
i think it would have been cool to go though. too bad no tickets:D



i guess i sorta miss this:)))

"your thoughts towards me are as countless as the sand, and you will never stop doing good to me."


"I wanted you to see what real courage was, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand."
-atticus